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We need 500 twitter comments (comments only) - repost

We need 500 unique comments less then 110 characters that we will use for tweets for a client of ours in the footwear industry.

NATIVE ENGLISH SPEAKING ONLY. PLEASE DONT WASTE OUR TIME WITH NON NATIVE ENGLISH SPEAKERS.

You can make them funny, you can make them interesting, they can be questions, or comments. I need 1000 unique comments to use on twitter are you the right person for the job? If this works we will also need more. Send me a sample of 2-3 comments and lets get started.

Example of tweets:

- I couldn't make your brakes work, so I made your horn louder !!

- Never assume anything, it makes an "ASS of U and ME"

- Check out these great flip flops that just came in to the store:

- Who out there has size 15 or larger feet? Where do you normally shop?

You will need to send the file in excel.

Please bid responsibly, this is NOT A HARD job but i need results and fast!

this is only for 500 comments, you do not need to post them only give me the comments in txt file...

Skills: Copywriting, Product Descriptions, Twitter

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About the Employer:
( 29 reviews ) Vancouver, Canada

Project ID: #4192252