VirtueMart plugin/hook to catch new orders

I need someone to write a very simple VirtueMart add-on/plugin/hook. There are a few requirements: * A function should get called whenever a new order is placed * A function should get called whenever an order changes status * The plugin/hook/add-on *should not* modify any core VirtueMart files, if at all possible * The plugin/hook must allow someone to set a single configuration variable specific to this plugin through the VirtueMart control panel * The function that gets called only needs to contain this code: [code] function the_function_here() { $fp = fopen('/path/to/[login to view URL]', 'a+'); fwrite($fp, 'Order #: ' . $the_order_number_here . ', status: ' . $the_order_status_here . ', config var: ' . $the_config_var_here); fclose($fp); } That's it. Should be pretty quick and simple for someone with VirtueMart experience.