Need traffic to a site.

Hello, I am in need of traffic to a site. The budget is $30. Please place only bids of $30. In your bid, please specify how much traffic you can get me in a week for that budget. If you do well this week, I will give you more jobs in the future. I have Google Analytics working on the site so I can trace your progress. Traffic must come in within 24 hours from starting the project. Best bid will win. Please also specify the methods you will use to get traffic. Be specific. Take a look at my example below. Example bid: 5000 views through: 1. 5 articles submitted to article directories 2. Mass mailing of 10000 people 3. 250 Forum posts That is just an example. I just want to see your methods. Do not bid if: 1. You want more than $30. 2. You cannot present your methods in a clear and organized way. 3. You are difficult to contact. At least be able to reply within 24 hours if I email you. Payment details: 1. Payment either GAF or Paypal. 2. No escrow at the beginning. If you reach half your target for the entire week, I will escrow the entire amount and release it when you have reached the full target. For Paypal, direct payment is sent when you reach full. GAF is the preferred payment mode. If you are okay with the terms above, place your bid of $30 now and include in your bid the word 'handsome' to convince me that you read the entire project details. Winner will hopefully be chosen in 12 hours. If no good bidders are present, I can open it up to 24 hours for more bidders. Remember, this will be ongoing if you are good.